Dealing with Life’s Challenges

Life can feel unmanageable at times. We feel unable to cope with what happens to us and can easily feel confused and anxious. Often, we may not even know what we are feeling, just that something isn’t right. We are just not ourselves. I have selected three techniques or questions that both my clients and have myself have found beneficial when the challenges of life feel insurmountable.

Grounding

Grounding, a form of meditation, is looking to soothe that part of you that feels unhappy, upset, or anxious. It won’t remove the issue but allow you to find more helpful ways to resolve it.  Find a comfortable place to sit. Drop into your body. Notice your breathing. Take a moment to tune into whatever sensations arrive. Notice the weight of your body on the chair, your feet on the floor perhaps, and relax into your breathing. Simply become aware of what your body is doing. This can be the first step to reducing the natural fight/flight response.

Boundaries

Some of our greatest upset can come from poorly defined or non-existent boundaries. Check and notice where you may need to be saying ‘no’ more than you’re saying ‘yes’. What are you letting into your world that belongs further away? This can be more challenging to achieve since you may feel the pressure of expectation or duty. If so, you may feel that others’ needs are more important than your own. Ask yourself why that may be. And what may be behind that belief.

Urgent and/or Important?

When it’s come to making decisions, one of the hugely useful tools I’ve offered my clients has been asking this question: Is it urgent or important, or both? If it’s neither then it can be dealt with later. If it’s both then it’s something that needs to be acted on. If it’s one or the other – urgent but not important or important but not urgent – check whether it’s something you need to handle immediately or perhaps delegate to another person.

What you Control, What you Don’t

It is easier said than done. However, I encourage you to harness this mindset. When you’re faced with a situation that causes you upset, anxiety, or anger, check to see whether you are in a position to control the outcome, influence it, or have no control over it. If you have control, what action however small can you make to its being achieved? The same question can be asked if you have some influence over it. If we have no control, then sit with acceptance. Accept that there is no control and find a way to be compassionate to yourself. In this way you’ll find it easier to let it go.

NOTE: Please note that this article is general signposting and is not a specific endorsement or recommendation by Ben Jackson Coaching.

Pricing Information

** Clients can stop or pause therapy at any time. There is no obligation to attend all sessions.

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